By Jason Cross/Gleaner Writer—
Sexologist Dr Shelly-Ann Weeks has urged Jamaican men to understand that they do not own women’s bodies and to find non-violent means of coping with sexual infidelity.
Her message comes less than 24 hours after a Jamaica Defense Force (JDF) member was placed under investigation for taking aim at his girlfriend’s alleged lover in Eltham Vista, Spanish Town, yesterday. The latest incident happened less than five days after another soldier shot and injured a cop after he was cuckolded by his policeman wife at home in Portmore.
The fleeing lover in Sunday’s shooting narrowly escaped injuries and possibly death by jumping over a wall.
Reports are that yesterday morning, a 42-year-old female office manager was at her Eltham Vista home in St Catherine when her 51-year-old partner, an army private, popped in and accused her of having an affair.
The soldier allegedly entered the house and confronted the paramour. An argument then developed between the men.
While the woman was in the process of letting her accused lover out the back door, the soldier exited the house, headed for the back of the premises, where he allegedly discharged a round from his licensed Glock pistol, which The Gleaner understands has been confiscated, pending ballistic checks.
The incident involving the soldier and the cop last week also took place in St Catherine.
Weeks expressed concern about the growing trend of men engaging in gun violence after finding out their partners are cheats.
“I want men to take the idea of ownership off the table. They don’t own women. Bounty Killer has the right analogy. He says men only rent some time and space. When the time is up, it’s up!” she said, making reference to the controversial dancehall artiste.
“She can do what she wants. What you are in charge of is how you respond to. Your actions don’t have to always be murder. A whole heap more woman deh a road who would like to spend time with you,” the sexologist added.
Weeks pointed out that women generally don’t resort to violence when they are victims of infidelity. She accused society of being biased in their views on the issue.
“Society needs to see a problem with the fact that people a pull dem gun for things like these. Even though some people say, ‘Well, him shouldn’t shoot her’, they still say they understand the man’s position, as if the fact him get ‘bun’ justifies him taking out his gun and start shooting. As long as you see it like that, it is not going to stop.
‘Bun’ is Jamaican parlance for sexual unfaithfulness.
Laparascopic surgeon Dr Alfred Dawes, in his In Focus column titled ‘Tek yuh bun and gwaan’ in the February 23 edition of The Sunday Gleaner, noted that women have shown to be better able to cope with infidelity than men.
“Women don’t kill cheating partners; they just slowly nag them to death. It is men who cannot see their way out of their depression with their damaged egos and public embarrassment,” said Dawes.
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